Common Fears in the First Term and How to Reassure Your Child

Starting Primary 1 is a big step for young children in Singapore. While some embrace it with excitement, many experience anxiety in the first few weeks. As parents, understanding these common fears—and responding with empathy and calm—can ease the transition and help children build confidence early in their school journey.

1. Fear of Making Mistakes

Many children worry about getting things wrong—whether it's answering a question incorrectly, forgetting homework, or using the wrong toilet.

What your child might say: “What if I write the wrong answer?” or “Will the teacher scold me?”
How to reassure: Normalize mistakes by saying, “That’s how we learn.” Share stories of your own school mishaps to lighten the mood.
What helps: Praise effort, not just correctness. Use phrases like “You tried your best!” or “Let’s figure it out together.”

2. Fear of Getting Lost

Schools may feel large and unfamiliar to new students, especially during recess or toilet breaks.

What your child might say: “I don’t know where the canteen is” or “What if I can’t find my classroom?”
How to reassure: Remind your child that there are teachers and older buddies everywhere to help. Let them know it’s okay to ask adults for directions.
What helps: Attend orientation with your child. Role-play how to ask for help. Revisit the school gates or paths if allowed before the first day.

3. Fear of Not Making Friends

Friendship is a big concern for many Primary 1 students. They may feel shy or worry about being left out.

What your child might say: “I don’t know anyone” or “Nobody wants to play with me.”
How to reassure: Encourage them to smile, say “hello,” and try joining others in games. Let them know that friendships take time and they’re not alone.
What helps: Practise introductions at home. If possible, arrange playdates with classmates or preschool friends who are attending the same school.

4. Fear of the Teacher

Children may see teachers as strict authority figures and fear being punished or scolded.

What your child might say: “What if my teacher is fierce?”
How to reassure: Explain that teachers are there to help, and they appreciate respectful, curious students.
What helps: Read books about school that portray kind teachers. Remind your child that teachers also want to get to know them.

5. Fear of Toileting Accidents

Some children are nervous about asking to go to the toilet or using unfamiliar facilities.

What your child might say: “What if I pee in my pants?”
How to reassure: Let them know that accidents are rare and nothing to be ashamed of. Teach them how to ask: “Teacher, may I go to the toilet?”
What helps: Practise using school-style cubicles in public places. Pack an extra set of underwear in their bag just in case.

6. General Anxiety About Change

The overall shift from preschool to formal schooling—new routines, uniforms, longer hours—can feel overwhelming.

What your child might feel: Irritability, clinginess, or tummy aches before school.
How to reassure: Validate their feelings. Say, “It’s okay to feel nervous. Lots of children feel the same.”
What helps: Keep routines consistent at home. Create a calming bedtime ritual and pack their bag together each night to build ownership.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)

1. How long does it take for a child to adjust to Primary 1?

Most children take 2 to 6 weeks to settle. Some may adjust quickly, while others need more time. Keep communicating with both your child and the teacher.

2. Should I stay with my child during the first few days?

Most schools in Singapore encourage independent drop-off. If separation anxiety is severe, check with the school if a short transition period is possible.

3. My child cries every morning before school. What can I do?

Remain calm and consistent. Avoid dragging goodbyes. Use positive affirmations and establish a confident morning routine. Seek help from the school counsellor if needed.

4. How can I know if my child is making friends?

Ask open-ended questions like, “Who did you sit with today?” or “What games did you play?” Listen without pressuring. Friendships often start slowly.

5. What if my child makes mistakes and gets discouraged?

Reinforce a growth mindset. Say things like, “It’s okay to get things wrong. That’s how we grow!” Celebrate effort and persistence over results.

Conclusion

It’s normal for children to feel uncertain as they begin Primary 1. With patience, encouragement, and steady routines, they will grow in confidence and find their footing. Most importantly, let your child know that they are not alone—and that you’ll be there to support them every step of the way.

Sources

Ministry of Education Singapore. www.moe.gov.sg
Singapore Children’s Society. “Helping Your Child Transition to Primary School.”
Harvard Center on the Developing Child. “Serve and Return Interaction.”